First Day! (Part 1)

If you were to ask me what my teaching nightmare would be, it would be the first day ... on repeat... forever. 

That anxiety. The back sweat. The awkward silences.

I hate the first day... and this year, I get to do it twice - with half a class each time. What a treat. (eye roll)


Despite how much I hate the first day of school, I have a first day of school tradition. I send an update to my family and friends about how I am feeling as I go into this new year. I'd like to share that here...
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Years ago. I got the words "Believe" and "Inspire" tattooed on my arm. Some days, it's there to get me through the tough moments. Others it reminds me how lucky I am to be entrusted with this work.

Never have I needed to believe as I do now...

We're going back to school tomorrow.
(Not pretend school where we get long lunches, jeans and gym shorts, and time to chat).
Real school.

And for every teacher eager to get back in the room, there is another constantly playing through the worst cast scenarios.
And for each happy reunion, there is the unspoken fear of when the first positives will hit. COVID is an unavoidable fog.

That said, over the last two weeks, I've seen the light stream through...

Teams dissecting their plans and swallowing their pride to make sure they choose best over familiar.
Colleagues - some that never talk - encouraging one another as they pass in the hall (...maybe because masks make the typical smile and nod irrelevant ).
A room full of anxious educators laughing off the irony of seeking out symmetry in a world of chaotic (and seemingly, relentless) asymmetry.
People stepping up to challenges they never could have anticipated - and just figuring. it. out.
If such powerful growth comes from the return of teachers, I can only imagine what inspiration the students will bring with them tomorrow.

We're worried. We're lacking confidence. We're afraid...
But if we believe in this opportunity, this community, and the hope of this moment, we can't fail. And we won't.